Oh man oh man, Where to start?
This
week has been a toughie...let's be honest. Missionary work is just
plain hard! HArder than I EVER imagined it to be. Some days I just feel
like an idiot going up to strangers and trying to talk to them in a
language I don't know. But then other days I just feel elated and
can't I want to talk to everyone! it is quite ridiculous, I just want
to be happy all the time and not worry, but ya know it's just not that
easy. I realized the other day that I get so frustrated with Spanish
becuase I ca'nt express myslef the way I would in English. In
spanish I'm just spouting off vocabulary trying to conjugate and simply
get the words out, but I just can't express myself with my personality
as I would in English and that is SO hard for me! BEcuase I don't want
be fake, but I can't help but feeling fake when that happens! So silly.
But Imma pushin through! We had a Zone training meeting yesterday--
and let's be honest I really didn't want to go becuase I knew we were
going to be doing a million role plays and practices and I just just
didn't want them to be telling me that I needed to improve because I
already knew that I needed to improve in EVerything! But, we went and
it was so amazing! President Cook showed up (which didn't help my
atttitude in the moment becuase it's already stressful practicing with
your zone leaders watching you every move, but then when your Mission
President comes and watches you, the pressure just multiplies by
10!!!). Anyways he was watching Hermana Kohrman and I practice setting
up and giving the First vision "15mph" so that our investigators can
really visualize it and internalize it while they hear it. Anyways, he
had just walked over from working with another group (in which he made
one of the other missionaries cry...unintentionally, but still she was
crying) and started listening to ME giving the first vision. Oh
man...stressfulll. But I was trying so hard to block everyone out and
just focus on the investigator. So, I finished and I looked up and him--
and there he was standing over me all teary eyed and he just said
"perfect". Um wow. It was sweet. Not that I am trying to be prideful,
but I really needed that vote of confidence right then and there in that
moment. Man I am so greatful for the Spirit and that I get the
opportunity to be an instrument in the Lord's hands and have the spirit
work through me!
We
had to drop Maria...our one investigator that was progressing. She
knows it's true--oh she knows it! But, she doesn't want to do it without
her husband. And her husband is NEVER home. It took us a while to
finally get that real reason out of her of why she didn't want to
act...but there it is. So we invited her to talk to her husband and
explain why this is so imprtant to her and that she wants to move
forward together, but she didn't seem to enthusiastic about it. We were
really bummed...but ya know everyone has their agency. We are going to
continie to stop by and see how's she's doing every once in a while, but
we're not teaching her anymore:(
We
had a Saweet experience yesterday though. We had just parked and were
getting out of the car to walk a few blocks to our appt's house and this
girl passes us just was I open the door. She was walking real fast so I
quickly said hey how ya doin? and she hesitantly turned and said hello.
Long story short, her name is Estera and she is from Romania- and she
had made the desicion THAT VERY DAY that she needed to make some changes
in her life, and then we stopped her and talked to her. Then she asked
us if we had a Bible for her to read, so we started talking about the
BOM and it was aweseom. We only had one in Span thoughUm, can we say
GOLDEN INVESTIGATOR?? Yes, yes we can. Except she doesn't speak
Spanish. Bummer. So we had to turn her over to the english elders! But
that's okay, becuase we are going to find someone just like her that
speaks spanish, and it's gonna be sweet. IT gave me the motivation to
talk to everyone becuase we really just don't know who has been
preapared and whop hasn't!
Mom-
I got you package yesterday:) Thanks for the 72hr lit supplies and the
scripture covers, they are great!! Sorry that you are sick! Man, that
is no fun at all.Congrats to Brin on your baptism!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cami-
that is hilarious that Brinly and Cade both started crying when the bus
passed them, thinking it forgot to pick them up! hahaha so so cute:)
Yes Tara- I got your letter from Florida, but I got it like 2 weeks
after I had already been here in CA. You sent me the link to some movie
clip on lds.org, but I just don't have enough time to watch it, so sorry:( Jami- Addie and Ella are such a hoot.
Oh
man, 1 minute left! Love yyou all!!! I am doing well, just growing and
becoming the missionary the Lord wants me to be ! Love you lots!!
Lynds
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